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Bad Means Good While Good Means Bad

Have you ever heard the phrase "Don't Judge The Book by Its Cover"?
How about the phrase "Good Girl always Love Bad Boy"?
There are the lot of Phares that reminds us about life that may end up surprising us about the fact


Once I'm mistaking salt for being like a sugar
I thought that care about people around is a must but then I forget how to love myself equally
I thought to fulfill my parents' expectation would bring me happiness but end up I do something halfheartedly
It is good to fulfill parents' expectation, but will they understand my passion?
Or is it me who is selfish?


I thought It would be great if I dated a smart and a hot guy at the same time but why it always ends with a pain
I thought every innocent people always the nicest, but I am wrong

All the principles I have since I was young now break into pieces.
Yeah I know I am bad!
I know I am selfish!
But, don't I have a right to live my life?

I'd like to fulfill my parents' will and my passion

I have tried my best to be better but ends up people hate me


I have tried to stick to my principle but I end up choosing care about people instead of myself
I have tried to believe that every good boy is always good inside

But I realize that I have to wait a little longer
I have to pretend that I'm okay

I can't force people to accept me
I have to admit that I am nothing compared to others
I have to admit that I have to wait a little longer  for the right time
I have to learn how to accept myself

I learn that bad means good
I learn that when people ignore me means I have the dozen people await
I learn that bad means good
When my heart badly hurt means I will be strong enough to face the future
I learn that bad means good
When I'm afraid that means It's worth to try
I learn that bad means good
by the time I keep failing, means I have to be patient and trust in God time even though people said it is impossible
 I learn that bad means well when I learn to love my imperfect self


I learn that good means bad
When I know that not every good boy in the outside always good in the inside
I learn good means bad
When I have to care about myself first and  more than caring people around
I learn good means bad
When I stay inside my shell rather than take the first step


Until then I must fight alone
Until then I must believe in myself

Until then I will thank those who said

''I will support every passion you have, as long as you don't give up on yourself''
''I know how you feel because people won't understand what and how you fight''








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The End

This situation (re: pandemic) makes me realize abut that quote Life isn't fair, and whether I'm ready or not I have to adjust myself Even for the last 19months, I doubt my faith in God I keep questioning Him for detailed reasons about everything that happened I wonder why my prayers haven't been answered even till the day I get up and write this thing I wonder why people never appreciate and notice me no matter how hard I try to compare to 'that people' I wonder why wise quotes keep saying about miracles and good news every morning when I see nothing changed except the way I see my life.. Yeah the way I see life..different I used to believe in dreams and goals, but my dreams and goals got cut off by the reality I used to believe that someday I'll be loved and I'll find love, but I got rejected and humiliated many times I used to believe I deserve chances, but I got none - I got kicked out because they only took me for granted People shared their pain with a

Pembuktian

Langit tak perlu berkoar-koar untuk membuktikan bahwa dirinya tinggi Hanya gedung sajalah yang perlu membuktikan bahwa dirinya tinggi Gedung itu berkoar-koar melalui manusia-manusia yang saling bertukar kata Gedung itu bahkan tidak menyadari bahwa dia akan dibanding dengan sesamanya Semakin ia bisa menyentuh langit, semakin banggalah dirinya Namun langit hanya tetap akan diam, dan memaklumi Langit tidak perlu berkoar-koar membuktikan dirinya tinggi Karena hujan akan turun untuk membuktikan Langit hanya perlu diam Orang-orang banyak berkoar-koar dengan percaya diri bahwa bumi itu besar tapi  mereka tidak tahu bahwa Jupiter jauh lebih besar tapi Jupiter tidak perlu berkoar-koar membuktikan dirinya besar Bahkan Jupiter pun sadar bahwa kelak akan ada yang lebih besar dibanding dirinya Peneliti pun membuktikan bahwa ada yang lebih besar dari Jupiter, OGLE-2016-BLG-1190Lb Mereka menyebutnya Exoplanet Laut tak perlu berkoar-koar untuk membuktikan bahwa dirinya luas

Cinderella

When I was young, girls at my age shared the same dreams of becoming a Princess Most of them said that they'd love to be Cinderella Well, I'm sure people on earth know the story of Cinderella A girl, A shoe, A Prince and also A magic. Every girls sure envy her, Cinderella But not every girls want to go through the same pain that Cinderella had once Step mother, step sisters, even being treated unfairly and don't forget that she has no chance to tell her father all the pains We all know that in fairy tale every Princess will have their happily ever after, but it will hard to find that in our real world It's even harder to be Cinderella in our life, seems like 1 in Million will turn out becoming Cinderella Ah, I wish that I could be Cinderella too I wish to spend the life like fairy tale Princesses have having a good palace, meet such a handsome Prince even having a magical time with love of my life What a good life..too good to be true Isn't