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Give And Take


Give and Take
Common word which always we hear while live our life
Give and Take
Like a part of puzzle that complete each other

Keep repeating those word by our mouth sounds like a piece of cake
Keep listening to those word sounds like a music
But.. out that word into an action is truly hard
until one day i decide to distance myself from others

People ask why i'm changing
People ask why i remain silent
People curious why i look stiff nowadays

should i say 'could you please look into a mirror?' ?
or should i say 'it is none of your business' ?

Once i told them i'm an introvert
but they don't believe it
They say i used to be easy going, cheerful, easy to approach
unlike these days
Right now in their eyes i'm a piece of trash, which has to be thrown into a trash can

I never mind about it
since they don't really understand introvert like me




Right now, i remain silent
I make limit to myself of speaking any words
i make limit to myself to approach people
i even build a wall so then no one can trespass
eventhough sometimes i feel like it's irritating
It's dying to keep distance from people first i got easy to laugh, share joke
but every time i want to cherish that moment i remember the hurt they gave to me
i remember the pain they scratch inside me

Don't they understand that life manes give and take?
The, why should i keep giving while they keep taking my kindness for granted?
I used to be nice to them
I appreciate every jokes while event it's not funny to laugh
I appreciate every topics they speak up
But in the end they treat me differently

I was good enough to treat them like i treat myself
I was nice enough to share my thoughts with them
but somehow i feel like they oppose my thoughts
they hate my sense, my point of view or i even think they hate that i'm exist here

So pathetic huh?
Well yeah, like always
People won't understand that life is give and take
People want to take and sucks the givers' blood without giving
People want to be treated nicely, but they can't treat the giver nicely
People only want to be approached, but they won't approach someone
It's not about the action, i'm talking about their eyes, their heart
The actions are good, but with no heart content

So..
I choose not to care
I choose to sit in the corner,
I choose to watch and listen
I will only speak when it is a good chance
I put that limit since now
I put that limit so i can live peacefully as introvert
I put that limit so then i don't have to be stress out because of their terms

And in the end, i free myself from them
I put myself in my comfort zone
and eventually i will see who really do an action with heart content

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