Afraid to fall

After experiencing lot of love stories.. now i decide to close my heart for another story..

It was begun when the reality shows me the real me..
how do i look, how do people think of me..
yeahh their judgement, funny isn't it?
But that the fact which make me to choose not to involve into any other love story..

I want to fall..yeah for sure want to fall..
but when i fall there's noone will catch me there..
they will just let me fall into and hurts..

though i don't fall, they will have a bad judgement about my appearance..

do i look different from other girls?
do i look such a freak in their eyes?
do i have a same right to fall or do i have a courage to feel that way?

The reality show me that it's absolutely NOT!!

there's no chance for me..

even though there's a chance..i will think cos they pity me

geez..such a miserable..

I just don't want to fall in love..

I just want to focus .. to reach my goal..

I just don't have time to heal my pain when i fall too hard..

i just don't have enough power to ignore that feeling

I..I.. I just want someday when i'm ready to fall..

I want to fall for those who will catch me
I..I.. I just want someone who will care enough about me

Maybe this time all things i do just imagine
Imagine how does it feel when being cared, being loved, or experiences lot of love story
Imagine how happy i am when being complimented though others talk bad about me

But yet, my heart still not ready..
My mind still not accepting these thing called "love"

Still right here i guess, i will be watching those lovers out there
Till the right time comes..

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